Stuck

Afton has always been such a huge blessing in my life. She is my bright spot. Her sweet spirit has gotten me through times of darkness and turmoil. I have already learned so much from being her mother. Everyday I learn more and more about how much my heavenly parent's love me just from feeling the love I have for her. I am constantly being taught lessons about life and who I am just by being her mother. The other day I was helping Afton take her clothes off so she could have a bath. I was pulling up her shirt and she slipped both of her arms out. The shirt was stuck over her face and she began to panic. She flailed her arms and whined. I tried to help her but she kept wiggling too much. I quietly reassured her that everything would be okay if she would just let me help. She calmed down and I was able to get her shirt off. In that moment it hit me. So many times in my life I have been stuck in darkness. I have panicked and not known what to do. I have forgotten that there is always someone there to help. I'm sure so many times I have been whispered to that it would all be okay if I just waited for help. Unfortunately many times I have not heard these quiet whispering a and have continued to flail in my darkness for quite some time before I was able to escape. I regret this. I'm sure in some ways I have made things harder for myself. This moment with Afton has stuck with me since it happened. I thought it over and over in my mind. The more I think about it the more I know that it is time for me to really start listening and being willing to receive help from those who love. I can no longer do it alone.